its been a really long time since i've blogged....wonderin if i still can......lezzeee!!!!!!
i'm the luckiest guy in the world!!!!! totally and without doubt!!!!!
i sometimes wonder what i ever did netime to deserve what i have today...and all i can think is that..i havent done nething.....mayb something will be taken from me....but i wud let it go.....coz i'm blessed!!!!!!!
its very simple......what cud be better than just gettin lost when you look at her eyes......or just totally speechless when she holds you........really.......does love actually do all that????
dunno...wuddnt...have never loved before......never been loved so much too!!!
every instant seems to be fantastic and everything seems to be rite....like there can be no wrong...its all perfect as perfect as her...if there ever cud be ne comparison!!!
life throws out its treats.....though i must admit i'm a little scared.....little would be an understatement.............i never wanna lose her...ever!!!!!!
Sunday, September 18, 2005
Friday, July 15, 2005
long gone
I was just going through some of the old stuff that I had stashed away, and I came up with quite a nostalgic treat, and just in the quest to prove to my sister that I am not selfish, I have decided to treat you to a literary extravaganza. For those of you who do not agree or half way through this piece want to leave, kindly do so, and in the process leave me your forwarding information, so that in the near future I may hunt you down and kill you.
So this is from a farewell card that we had made for our school, St.Mary's High School, Mount Abu.
Here goes:
This is not the end:
But an ending;
At this juncture to
Forsake the past
And to embrace the future
Is not easy.
This is an ending
For another beginning,
A departure necessary
For another arrival.
Emotions overpower the body
And the heart overpowers the mind.
Tears well up in the eyes
And pain fills the heart.
It is difficult;
Very difficult;
To say goodbye.
So this is from a farewell card that we had made for our school, St.Mary's High School, Mount Abu.
Here goes:
This is not the end:
But an ending;
At this juncture to
Forsake the past
And to embrace the future
Is not easy.
This is an ending
For another beginning,
A departure necessary
For another arrival.
Emotions overpower the body
And the heart overpowers the mind.
Tears well up in the eyes
And pain fills the heart.
It is difficult;
Very difficult;
To say goodbye.
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
its different
As I mentioned that I would be turning into a new leaf, I decided to try my hand at some shayari......so here goes!!!!
Waqt hi hai humare paon ki zanjeer,
Aana jaana, bas yahi hai takdeer,
Kal bichad gaye to jaane fir kab mulakaat hogi..
Aap na sahi apki yaad humare saath hogi.
another one:
This one is part of an sms conversation at night with a friend...
Me:
Waakif hain hum apke rag rag se,
Kisne kaha ki hum abhi abhi hain mile,
Milte toh anjaan hain:
Aapse bhi mulakat ko bhala milna kehte hain??
Friend:
Kya jaante hain aap humare baare mein??
Humari khwahishen hai chupi door kisi taare mein.
Me:
Khwahish agar manzil hoti,
Chaahat agar hakeekat,
Kyun itne door hote aapke kareeb hokar bhi....
Aapke paas nahi aa jaate isi waqt!!!!!
So what say......Watch out Ghalib??????
Waqt hi hai humare paon ki zanjeer,
Aana jaana, bas yahi hai takdeer,
Kal bichad gaye to jaane fir kab mulakaat hogi..
Aap na sahi apki yaad humare saath hogi.
another one:
This one is part of an sms conversation at night with a friend...
Me:
Waakif hain hum apke rag rag se,
Kisne kaha ki hum abhi abhi hain mile,
Milte toh anjaan hain:
Aapse bhi mulakat ko bhala milna kehte hain??
Friend:
Kya jaante hain aap humare baare mein??
Humari khwahishen hai chupi door kisi taare mein.
Me:
Khwahish agar manzil hoti,
Chaahat agar hakeekat,
Kyun itne door hote aapke kareeb hokar bhi....
Aapke paas nahi aa jaate isi waqt!!!!!
So what say......Watch out Ghalib??????
Sunday, June 26, 2005
Whims and Repercussions
Hello there, tinsel town...
here I come,
Its me, and no another:
Your pal, your friendly chum,
Open your doors, let me in,
And let the fairytale begin!!!
The time has come, and I have set out,
In conquest of the proverbial rise and shine.....
Another day, another tale,
A destiny to make,still only mine.
Open your doors,let me in,
And let the fairytale begin!!!
A prolonged silence, thats all I hear...
My knocks cease,reciprocating my shout.
Is anybody there, I've been searching long,
Just try me in, just hear me out!!
Oh, open your doors,let me in,
And let the fairytale begin!!!
My sight is waning, my hearing loose,
My hair is gray, and I shout a squeak,
Its still not open, no luck at all,
Not even a crack to sneak a peak.
The doors haven't opened,
They haven't let me in,
The end has come, and I'm on my way,
Maybe now the fairytale will begin,
Maybe now,my destiny made!!!!!!
here I come,
Its me, and no another:
Your pal, your friendly chum,
Open your doors, let me in,
And let the fairytale begin!!!
The time has come, and I have set out,
In conquest of the proverbial rise and shine.....
Another day, another tale,
A destiny to make,still only mine.
Open your doors,let me in,
And let the fairytale begin!!!
A prolonged silence, thats all I hear...
My knocks cease,reciprocating my shout.
Is anybody there, I've been searching long,
Just try me in, just hear me out!!
Oh, open your doors,let me in,
And let the fairytale begin!!!
My sight is waning, my hearing loose,
My hair is gray, and I shout a squeak,
Its still not open, no luck at all,
Not even a crack to sneak a peak.
The doors haven't opened,
They haven't let me in,
The end has come, and I'm on my way,
Maybe now the fairytale will begin,
Maybe now,my destiny made!!!!!!
Monday, June 20, 2005
hold on..allz not lost
hello darlingz,
i henceforth solemnly swear that i shall put up my future posts with an increased grammatical accuracy and a reduced RTWT( reader time wasting tactics).
if u r wonderin as to why....then dont........i just decided to turn over a new leaf!!!!
so next post onwards.......the new...the renovated......the deadly..
PROXYMORONS!!!!!
i henceforth solemnly swear that i shall put up my future posts with an increased grammatical accuracy and a reduced RTWT( reader time wasting tactics).
if u r wonderin as to why....then dont........i just decided to turn over a new leaf!!!!
so next post onwards.......the new...the renovated......the deadly..
PROXYMORONS!!!!!
Thursday, June 02, 2005
chee....and what a start
tra la laa........dee da da dum!!!!!
thats all i can think of for the timebeing.
the end of the vector problem and enough of the philosophy...time to get bak to what i came here in the first place...have fun!!!!
my network provider is providin me with 400 bucks of free sms and at 25 paise an sms...thats 1600 smss. wonder what i'm gonna do with all that!! heh heh.....don even think abt it...8888 costs 2 bucks still!!
the first leg of my project done with, i've spent the last week lazin and gazin.......and grazin: food for thought, have been thinkin a lot and tryin to estabilish some priorities in life and just tryin to figure out the central viewpoint it should contour.......woah that takes a lot of introspection and guess what, the results of this big finding myself thing are out...and i'm well on my way to get a different viewpoint of the lens that i use to see the world!!!!
i'm happy coz i've realised that i havent lost my readin speed...found that out last nite...finished a novel really quick!!!!!
more so....its gonna be the end of 3 weeks in poona and pretty soon...the end of the hols, guess heaven is shortlived afterall!!!! in the meantime i'm really missin college and frndz and the evenings, saturday nites, the booze parties, the job trts, the xam tension and the ever busy cellphone..and not to mention chicken at traditions.......everybody!!!!! col life is amazing and i'm gonna miss it when itz done and i guess i'm attracted to allahabad even though as a city itz kinda sad!!!! Allahabad..if ur listenin.....I LOVE U!!!
pune on the other hand has been a different experience....having to fend for oneself, and all that. seemed the same as col life at the start but then it took some gettin used to not having a support system around u. pretty nervewrecking and on the whole...a great learning experience. much as i regret not havin home cuisine to tuck into....this is one trip i will never regret!!!!
the cash system is pretty critical as well........and i guess i'm just gonna have to keep learnin how to make the best use of it.
and yeah the best part: got my first paycheck yeaterday!!! still deciding on what i'm gonna get every1 with all that cash!!! earnin ur own cash sure has its charm...and gawd............ its intoxicating and addictive!!!
also i'm gearing up for all the hurdles that lie ahead....by sittin and concentrating on my work..though most of the time i'm still stuck to messenger but on the whole...i think this will go quite a distance in helpin me to concentrate on what i do!!!
so well...thats that, no particular order....just whatever came out of my head as and when!!!!
great start in life, isnt it????
thats all i can think of for the timebeing.
the end of the vector problem and enough of the philosophy...time to get bak to what i came here in the first place...have fun!!!!
my network provider is providin me with 400 bucks of free sms and at 25 paise an sms...thats 1600 smss. wonder what i'm gonna do with all that!! heh heh.....don even think abt it...8888 costs 2 bucks still!!
the first leg of my project done with, i've spent the last week lazin and gazin.......and grazin: food for thought, have been thinkin a lot and tryin to estabilish some priorities in life and just tryin to figure out the central viewpoint it should contour.......woah that takes a lot of introspection and guess what, the results of this big finding myself thing are out...and i'm well on my way to get a different viewpoint of the lens that i use to see the world!!!!
i'm happy coz i've realised that i havent lost my readin speed...found that out last nite...finished a novel really quick!!!!!
more so....its gonna be the end of 3 weeks in poona and pretty soon...the end of the hols, guess heaven is shortlived afterall!!!! in the meantime i'm really missin college and frndz and the evenings, saturday nites, the booze parties, the job trts, the xam tension and the ever busy cellphone..and not to mention chicken at traditions.......everybody!!!!! col life is amazing and i'm gonna miss it when itz done and i guess i'm attracted to allahabad even though as a city itz kinda sad!!!! Allahabad..if ur listenin.....I LOVE U!!!
pune on the other hand has been a different experience....having to fend for oneself, and all that. seemed the same as col life at the start but then it took some gettin used to not having a support system around u. pretty nervewrecking and on the whole...a great learning experience. much as i regret not havin home cuisine to tuck into....this is one trip i will never regret!!!!
the cash system is pretty critical as well........and i guess i'm just gonna have to keep learnin how to make the best use of it.
and yeah the best part: got my first paycheck yeaterday!!! still deciding on what i'm gonna get every1 with all that cash!!! earnin ur own cash sure has its charm...and gawd............ its intoxicating and addictive!!!
also i'm gearing up for all the hurdles that lie ahead....by sittin and concentrating on my work..though most of the time i'm still stuck to messenger but on the whole...i think this will go quite a distance in helpin me to concentrate on what i do!!!
so well...thats that, no particular order....just whatever came out of my head as and when!!!!
great start in life, isnt it????
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
philo dude
Another day at work and another jolt with realisation.
Is this what i want to do with my life, is this where my car is heading, to a monotony of a 9 to 6 job, of an endless quest for a "career", a "future", a "life".
Please follow me as I estabilish my arguments and dwell on the fact that the solution to this problem is not as simple as it may seem. Some people believe I think too much, others condemn me as a pessimist, but very few if any realise that all I'm trying to do is weigh my options, making sure that I have before me what I call the worst of every bit of the argument so that I may know exactly what to expect and the extent to which it may, if at all, backfire.
Life may not be complicated but neither is that simple. There may be a theory forming in your mind that I do not know what I want for the headline under my name totally contradicts what I have stated in the lines above. For such minds, here's a piece of advice, stay with me on this!!!
very often all we need to do is make a decision, usually either in the affirmative or the negative, but not at the expense of the goal. Every decision must be weighed and considered, and then an outcome decided upon. Thoughtless action in the form of blatant madness hardly gets us anywhere.
Whew, enough for the day...until next time!!!
Is this what i want to do with my life, is this where my car is heading, to a monotony of a 9 to 6 job, of an endless quest for a "career", a "future", a "life".
Please follow me as I estabilish my arguments and dwell on the fact that the solution to this problem is not as simple as it may seem. Some people believe I think too much, others condemn me as a pessimist, but very few if any realise that all I'm trying to do is weigh my options, making sure that I have before me what I call the worst of every bit of the argument so that I may know exactly what to expect and the extent to which it may, if at all, backfire.
Life may not be complicated but neither is that simple. There may be a theory forming in your mind that I do not know what I want for the headline under my name totally contradicts what I have stated in the lines above. For such minds, here's a piece of advice, stay with me on this!!!
very often all we need to do is make a decision, usually either in the affirmative or the negative, but not at the expense of the goal. Every decision must be weighed and considered, and then an outcome decided upon. Thoughtless action in the form of blatant madness hardly gets us anywhere.
Whew, enough for the day...until next time!!!
Monday, May 30, 2005
ze paradigm shift
Hmmmm.....I've been thinking, to get some decent writing in and not to be accussed of plagiarism is kinda difficult.
the problem started when some1 said:
" if every prelude has an aftermath, and every aftermath a prelude, why do anything at all??? "
doggone right!!!! don u think???
and here i go gettin carried away again when the sole objective of this very untimely post was to get me of the mark towards decent writing.
u know what: IT STILL IS !!!
I've been going thru the 7 habits of highly effective people for a second innings and well, am kinda inspired by the whole concept of the paradigm shift. it brings a whole new perspective to interpretation and gives emphasis to the change in the process rather than the endpoints. great concept.
think about it.....the world seems the way u luk at it.
in the book, covey gives an example of a dr.frankl who lived in the freudian era when every1 thought u could do what u could bcoz it was unto u to do it. he was a jew and locked away in prison camps during the nadir of human existence and the peak of nazi atrocities. at a time when our sense of decency would revolt rather instinctively at the mention of the physically and mentally degrading torture the prisoners were subjected to, frankl kept his mental liberty at par with those out in the open. he had realized that while the nazis could subject him to any sort of physical restraint, they could not supress his imagination. using this: a stark contradiction to freudian fundamentals.With a whole lot of luck on his side, he was finally released when the nazis were brought down and he later went bak to his former profession of a physician!!!
amazing story......we cud learn a lesson or two!!!!!
i just had to put this story somewhere.....it gives a whole new way to luk at life....for the only way we can be hurt is to allow some1 to hurt us.
until next time-----ciao!!
the problem started when some1 said:
" if every prelude has an aftermath, and every aftermath a prelude, why do anything at all??? "
doggone right!!!! don u think???
and here i go gettin carried away again when the sole objective of this very untimely post was to get me of the mark towards decent writing.
u know what: IT STILL IS !!!
I've been going thru the 7 habits of highly effective people for a second innings and well, am kinda inspired by the whole concept of the paradigm shift. it brings a whole new perspective to interpretation and gives emphasis to the change in the process rather than the endpoints. great concept.
think about it.....the world seems the way u luk at it.
in the book, covey gives an example of a dr.frankl who lived in the freudian era when every1 thought u could do what u could bcoz it was unto u to do it. he was a jew and locked away in prison camps during the nadir of human existence and the peak of nazi atrocities. at a time when our sense of decency would revolt rather instinctively at the mention of the physically and mentally degrading torture the prisoners were subjected to, frankl kept his mental liberty at par with those out in the open. he had realized that while the nazis could subject him to any sort of physical restraint, they could not supress his imagination. using this: a stark contradiction to freudian fundamentals.With a whole lot of luck on his side, he was finally released when the nazis were brought down and he later went bak to his former profession of a physician!!!
amazing story......we cud learn a lesson or two!!!!!
i just had to put this story somewhere.....it gives a whole new way to luk at life....for the only way we can be hurt is to allow some1 to hurt us.
until next time-----ciao!!
Thursday, May 26, 2005
the vector debacle
u c when in 1st year, we has this subject called maths...( which i got an A in....hence the absence of the so called adjectives before the word ), and we had this topic called vectors. it sucked.....bigtime!!!!!!
and obviously, being the smart ass that i am...i left it to providence to get me thru' and it did.........read the bracketed phrase.
but now...a year later, it has come bak to haunt me.
dammit..the training project now has a task that i must solve ony by vectors and the fact that i know nuthin abt it has helped no matters. i'm totally and darned disgusted and not to mention stupendously screwed....( excuse my excessive alliterative use.)
and now on project time with nuthin better to do than fret over my incapability to think in vectorial aspects...i have taken to the next best thing to do.......write a post about my messed up fortune.
and did u know my results are out and that i have delivered yet another bone shattering performance...kudos to me!!! and that i spent the next few hours filling up my already bursting cranial membrane that mayb engg was not for me.....and then my eggtop cudnt take it anymore and dished out rather unsophisticated views on the matter to every1 on my messenger list.....hmmmmm.....not exciting is it??
now that i'm over it but not yet over the crap about my rotten luck abt vectors...i have really nuthin else to do but fret about it...so back to frettin....fret fret fret....sigh.....cya!!!!!
and obviously, being the smart ass that i am...i left it to providence to get me thru' and it did.........read the bracketed phrase.
but now...a year later, it has come bak to haunt me.
dammit..the training project now has a task that i must solve ony by vectors and the fact that i know nuthin abt it has helped no matters. i'm totally and darned disgusted and not to mention stupendously screwed....( excuse my excessive alliterative use.)
and now on project time with nuthin better to do than fret over my incapability to think in vectorial aspects...i have taken to the next best thing to do.......write a post about my messed up fortune.
and did u know my results are out and that i have delivered yet another bone shattering performance...kudos to me!!! and that i spent the next few hours filling up my already bursting cranial membrane that mayb engg was not for me.....and then my eggtop cudnt take it anymore and dished out rather unsophisticated views on the matter to every1 on my messenger list.....hmmmmm.....not exciting is it??
now that i'm over it but not yet over the crap about my rotten luck abt vectors...i have really nuthin else to do but fret about it...so back to frettin....fret fret fret....sigh.....cya!!!!!
Thursday, May 19, 2005
wakkao
hee haah.....big bang and the curtains...off with the drape.......its me.
hmm.last blog during the xams...this one in between a training project...not very sincere, am I??? Don answer that, I really don care.
neways people.....if there r any.... reading the crap i dish out.....what the???? at least for the sake of the let it out factor.....lets get bak to some serious blogging.
life has taken turns since i last surfed the portals of this text editor and every turn shall be carefully and rather acutely scrutinized and brought to the foyer...no strings attached.
first of all xams....man was i glad when they were done.......it was 8 days of pure torture....teeth grittable, fist clenchable and back whippable. was expecting some great stuff to happen in he next few days....had a few great plans...but then one evening changed it all......my wish never to be....not that 'tis my wish anymore. but the crushng sensation reeled as i slid into an alcohol enhanced and sorrow driven stupour of which i don think i'm totally out yet.
hell.......................
the journey home was one of its kind.....with plenty of entertainment as my groupmates began what normal people may refer to as monkey antics and what they call definitely a copywrite original masterpiece.nevertheless...the end was the best....had some1 spl cum n pick me up at the station.felt gud...that.
neways bak home..and again the old lecture on how long my hair was gettin.....i had it cut a week before mind u......met all, was happy and the my long deserved rest....................................................still....................was....................not to be!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pune time........had to get to pune to fix up my accomodation for training....at geometric software.
hmmmmmmmmmmm...so be it
pune it was and i met my gud ol frndz from skool...mount abu,ya u heard it rite...the famous hill station.......yeah...my gud 'ol skool mates. but be4 that...got a chance to test my driving skills in pune with my friend's car and yeah...passed with distinction.
met the guys...had port wine and then met the man whuz flat i wud be stayin in.kinda niccce....with hopefully a nicer flat.........i'm bad.
went bak home...and ate ate and ate.........and slept...and met frnds ..the usual stuff.
the day was here...goin to pune with my luggage or 2 months of paid masti....did i tell u i was being paid for that shit......hah...talk about nice things happenin to nice people!!!!!!!! ;P
got to pune and the flat and then received a mail from the company guys that they had arranged for me to stay at a 3 star hotel executive suite for a week......went bonkers and wondered as to how rozy cud life get.....not much more, i was sure........heh heh.........hope i aint rite.
day 1 at geometric n this huge induction programmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmme...and i'm almost snoring as i realise with shocking effects that i am being taxed for what i was gettin.........man.......that sucks...bvut not as much as it does now after 300 odd lines of source code and the fact that i have to rewrite all that..............damn
cha cha......will blog bigger next time!!!!
hmm.last blog during the xams...this one in between a training project...not very sincere, am I??? Don answer that, I really don care.
neways people.....if there r any.... reading the crap i dish out.....what the???? at least for the sake of the let it out factor.....lets get bak to some serious blogging.
life has taken turns since i last surfed the portals of this text editor and every turn shall be carefully and rather acutely scrutinized and brought to the foyer...no strings attached.
first of all xams....man was i glad when they were done.......it was 8 days of pure torture....teeth grittable, fist clenchable and back whippable. was expecting some great stuff to happen in he next few days....had a few great plans...but then one evening changed it all......my wish never to be....not that 'tis my wish anymore. but the crushng sensation reeled as i slid into an alcohol enhanced and sorrow driven stupour of which i don think i'm totally out yet.
hell.......................
the journey home was one of its kind.....with plenty of entertainment as my groupmates began what normal people may refer to as monkey antics and what they call definitely a copywrite original masterpiece.nevertheless...the end was the best....had some1 spl cum n pick me up at the station.felt gud...that.
neways bak home..and again the old lecture on how long my hair was gettin.....i had it cut a week before mind u......met all, was happy and the my long deserved rest....................................................still....................was....................not to be!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pune time........had to get to pune to fix up my accomodation for training....at geometric software.
hmmmmmmmmmmm...so be it
pune it was and i met my gud ol frndz from skool...mount abu,ya u heard it rite...the famous hill station.......yeah...my gud 'ol skool mates. but be4 that...got a chance to test my driving skills in pune with my friend's car and yeah...passed with distinction.
met the guys...had port wine and then met the man whuz flat i wud be stayin in.kinda niccce....with hopefully a nicer flat.........i'm bad.
went bak home...and ate ate and ate.........and slept...and met frnds ..the usual stuff.
the day was here...goin to pune with my luggage or 2 months of paid masti....did i tell u i was being paid for that shit......hah...talk about nice things happenin to nice people!!!!!!!! ;P
got to pune and the flat and then received a mail from the company guys that they had arranged for me to stay at a 3 star hotel executive suite for a week......went bonkers and wondered as to how rozy cud life get.....not much more, i was sure........heh heh.........hope i aint rite.
day 1 at geometric n this huge induction programmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmme...and i'm almost snoring as i realise with shocking effects that i am being taxed for what i was gettin.........man.......that sucks...bvut not as much as it does now after 300 odd lines of source code and the fact that i have to rewrite all that..............damn
cha cha......will blog bigger next time!!!!
Sunday, April 24, 2005
the call
the beginning: i look........
the world......new: brand new!!!!
the green tint,
the blue ceiling,
the brown heart,
the ice within.
the doors are shut,
my angel beckons,
not the EARTH, not the EARTH...she cries
too late, it has been done.......i live!
why????
the insanity of it all....
imcomprehendability.....
the fickle ego....the problem,
let me out...it shouts,
the pitiless burns......red and ransacked civilisation,
blessing or curse....boon or bane,
no i didnt find out...
couldnt
will never
i'm a human.......the living dead!!!
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